Seaside shits and giggles
Girls weekend away (me + Rei)
I’ve been shitting through the eye of a needle for the better part of a week, but it still didn’t stop me from taking my furry bestie to the beach for the weekend.
In hindsight, it probably should have - but the stubborn bitch in me (and the fact I’d lose a chunk of £££ if I cancelled last minute) meant I sucked it up (take that as literally as you like) and risked the squeaky-bum-time drive to soak up four days of sunshine by the sea.
And fuck me, it was worth it.
Once I’d wrestled with my overwhelming urge to DO ALL THE THINGS and EAT ALL THE THINGS (being physically unable to helped!) - and told the brain gremlins to shut up (“What’s the point in being here if I can’t explore, eat, hike, and swim?!”) - I finally dropped out of my head, into my body, took the biggest breath in and… it was magic.
My whole body softened (thankfully not my butthole), and waves of calm and gratitude crashed over me. I remembered what a fucking privilege it is to bugger off for a long weekend and actually rest in such a gorgeous place. Nothing but sea breeze and birdsong, waking with the sun and winding down with cosy fires and early nights in a hut overlooking the Northumberland coast. My body wasn’t giving me much, but the universe clearly was - gentle walks, sleepy mornings, and watching Rei live her best beach life was clearly what I needed.
Holidays for me usually revolve around food - I bloody love it! I usually pick places to visit based on breakfast, lunch, tea and snack potential. But this time, knowing I might not be able to eat much, I packed a stash of safe beige basics. And while it was hard to resist the call of seafood shacks and chip shops, it was actually refreshing to just follow my feet along the coast path, listen to what my body could manage, and sip water like it was my job (a week off the booze too, go me).
Normally I’d be here reeling off a long list of must-visits and foodie gems, but this trip was a little different.
So instead, here’s a short, wholesome-as-fuck roundup:
Accommodation:
Shoreside Huts, Alnmouth - absolute, off-grid perfection by the sea. A bed so comfy I genuinely didn’t want to leave it and all the gorgeous, creative touches made it feel like a cosy home-from-home.
Right on St Oswald’s way, we were a short walk from the most beautiful, stretch of coast with so many nearby villages, harbours and vast sandy beaches to explore. It really was idyllic.
Eating Out :
Spoiler. I didn’t.
But I did risk a classic ‘99’ on Alnmouth beach, which I shared with Rei and before promptly running off to find a loo!
Food:
Mostly beige and carb-heavy - except on Saturday when I chanced a pasta dinner, lost half of it down the sink, and then spent the night on the loo (again!) Apparently, my gut wasn’t quite ready for anything more adventurous than white bread.
Activities:
I use the term loosly, as normally you’d expect to see epic hiking routes, swimming in the sea, jumping off things or running around all over the place but this time, this trip really was a about R&R.
It was all about gentle walks, sunrise brews, naps, beach wanders, more naps, a paddle in the sea, even more naps, short strolls along the coastal path, building fires, and early nights with herbal teas.
Oh, and drawing the odd dick in the sand—it was Rei, honest!
stop offs:
With my insides being a bit of a liability (more than usual anyway!) I’d been careful to plan in plenty of places to stop along the way and not to blow my own trumpet or anything, but I think I did pretty well with these!
Hackfall
A gorgeous forest walks, waterfalls, wild garlic and hidden beaches!
Amble
Cute harbour town with great views across to Coquet Island
Newbiggin-by-the-Sea
Sand for days, which Rei illegally ran across with her frisbee… zero fucks given!
Northumberlandia
The Lady of the North. A huge land art sculpture in the shape of a reclining female figure. Of course we climbed up a boob first.
Wetherby Services
Not the most picturesque but Rei and I shared a sandwich without shitting ourselves!
Milton Country Park
An old haunt, to stretch the legs just before dropping Rei back home. Still as peaceful and pretty as I remember.
I’m not sure how interesting this post will be to anyone else, but as always, I’m writing it more as a note to myself: to calm the fuck down and just be. Hopefully you’ve enjoyed the pictures though!
Look after yourselves, folks.
Be present. Be grateful. Be kind to your guts.
💩
